After I realized that the central theme for the Gospel According to John is agapé, because in the account of the Last Supper so much importance is given to agapé as the summary of all that Jesus had been doing for his whole ministry, I searched through the other themes. That took me back to the opening of the Gospel.
I still remember a time when I was studying for the ministry when we were learning about the Greek word ‘logos.’ One day when I was contemplating what ‘logos’ meant, I had the realization that it was the power of love. But not just any kind of love. To convey the full meaning of the way ‘logos’ appears in the opening of John, there had to be a focus on divine love and its creative power. Then later on in the class we learned that ‘agape’ pointed to that divine love. So not only was there spiritual meaning to the way ‘logos’ was used to open John’s gospel, but also there was spiritual meaning to the way Jesus used ‘agape’ in his teachings at the Last Supper. After all these decades I’ve come to see that just as the simple English attempt to translate ‘logos’ as ‘word’ was way off in giving the meaning of ‘logos,’ so I’ve come to realize that ‘love’ is way off in giving the meaning of ‘agapé.’
So what do we have in those opening verses? When we look for their meaning from the theme of agapé, we are able to show how the opening verses circle back to the teaching about agapé during the Last Supper. In the first 4 verses of John we find a description of logos as the spiritual power of divine creativity. It brought life to all that is — and infused all of life with deeply spiritual meaning. So John was showing that the eternal creative Essence came to flesh. Then he identified that eternal creative Essence with Jesus. And he then implied that Jesus identified with the eternal creative Essence.
And that seems to be the basis for the summary of his ministry as waking up people to the awareness of the agapé that had been poured into our hearts from the beginning of our creation. The spiritual meaning of agapé is divine creativity underlying human relationships — and of life itself. The ministry of Jesus opened people’s awareness of the power of agapé in their hearts; among other actions, it helped people see their identity with the eternal creative Essence.
So the opening of the Gospel According to John can be understood to mean:
In the beginning was the creative power. The creative power was in God’s presence, and the creative power was divine. He was present with divine power in the beginning. Through him all things came into being, and apart from him not a thing came to be. That which had come to be in him was life, and this life was the light of humanity. The light shines on in the darkness, for the darkness did not overcome it. … To those who did accept him he empowered to become God’s children.
The proof of those verses comes in both action and teaching. We look to what Jesus did among people and to what he taught. When Jesus is portrayed as identifying with the logos (as eternal creative Essence), and when he is quoted as saying “I am …” in a spiritual sense, those words were meant to realize that he identified more with eternal creative Essence than with the ego-identity people saw as ‘Jesus.’ And he was calling people to change their own way of viewing their own identity in the way he did.
The first example we can point to in John is when Jesus looked at the temple in Jerusalem, he said, “Destroy this temple and in three days I will raise it up.” Obviously, he wasn’t meaning that he, in the form of Jesus, would build the temple. He was using “I” to mean the eternal creative Essence would be recognized as the true human identity and so there would no longer be any need for a structural temple. And when he said, “The water that I give will become in those who drink it a spring of water that bubbles up into eternal life,” he was referring to the “I” of eternal creative Essence, and when people become deeply aware of it within themselves, they will recognize their true identification with eternal life. So when he said, “I am not from this world,” he was saying that he wasn’t identifying with the ego-identity they saw as ‘Jesus’ but was identifying with eternal creative Essence. Then when he said, “I am the gate. Whoever enters through me will be saved,” he was saying that salvation is found in identifying with eternal creative Essence and not with anything else.
Monday, May 18, 2015
Saturday, April 18, 2015
Prayer box
Recently I’ve been reading a book about prayer by Anne Lamott, in which she summarizes all prayer types into 3 main categories. She names them simply, as in the title of her book, as Help, Thanks, Wow. On page 36 she described a material tool she uses to assist her with the toughest prayers of “help.” She said that tool is a box.
She uses that box to help let go of something that troubles her. Into the box she puts a written page onto which she describes whatever kind of internal struggle she is having. That’s a way to give a physical action for the process of psychological or spiritual letting go. The point is a material tool can help with the big struggles that mess up her well-being.
Such a tool helps because it becomes a way to see and feel the letting go process. She remembered a time of extreme stress when someone said to her, “Just let go and let God,” and the feeling that came over her was to hit that person. In that moment her thought was, “If it were that simple, I’d had done it.”
So how the box process works is first to actually write down a description (in as much detail as possible) of what you need divine help with — and why you can’t do it yourself. Merely admitting on paper the need for help brings about the beginning of a more effective way of letting go. The next step is to hold the paper next to your heart for several seconds. Next comes the prayer or time for meditation that begins by reading slowly what is written; followed by closing your eyes and meditating on those written words. Finally, slowly place the paper in the box. Take a deep breath as you close the lid then sigh the breath away as you pray the message to be ‘sent.’
Ms. Lamott then explained that an agreement needed to be made with yourself to not open the box until you sense that something happens to make you think the prayer has been answered. Of course, she admits that time is often a problem for us because there may be a long time before we sense that answer.
She said this box helps in cases of being worried, obsessed, angry, or distressed so much you feel like nothing can be done to stop your anguish. Also, she has used it to help with a relationship that upsets her so much she can’t see a way for reconciliation — that’s when she writes down a description of what the relationship problem is, then puts that in the box.
To all of this I would add the power of agapé. The prayer I could see as helpful for letting go would be something like, “I pray for the power of agapé to work on this.” And here again is where we need to remember (as that ancient religious leader, Paul, said) agape is patient. We need to be patient with agape because the answer we sense may take longer to fulfill than we wish it would.
She uses that box to help let go of something that troubles her. Into the box she puts a written page onto which she describes whatever kind of internal struggle she is having. That’s a way to give a physical action for the process of psychological or spiritual letting go. The point is a material tool can help with the big struggles that mess up her well-being.
Such a tool helps because it becomes a way to see and feel the letting go process. She remembered a time of extreme stress when someone said to her, “Just let go and let God,” and the feeling that came over her was to hit that person. In that moment her thought was, “If it were that simple, I’d had done it.”
So how the box process works is first to actually write down a description (in as much detail as possible) of what you need divine help with — and why you can’t do it yourself. Merely admitting on paper the need for help brings about the beginning of a more effective way of letting go. The next step is to hold the paper next to your heart for several seconds. Next comes the prayer or time for meditation that begins by reading slowly what is written; followed by closing your eyes and meditating on those written words. Finally, slowly place the paper in the box. Take a deep breath as you close the lid then sigh the breath away as you pray the message to be ‘sent.’
Ms. Lamott then explained that an agreement needed to be made with yourself to not open the box until you sense that something happens to make you think the prayer has been answered. Of course, she admits that time is often a problem for us because there may be a long time before we sense that answer.
She said this box helps in cases of being worried, obsessed, angry, or distressed so much you feel like nothing can be done to stop your anguish. Also, she has used it to help with a relationship that upsets her so much she can’t see a way for reconciliation — that’s when she writes down a description of what the relationship problem is, then puts that in the box.
To all of this I would add the power of agapé. The prayer I could see as helpful for letting go would be something like, “I pray for the power of agapé to work on this.” And here again is where we need to remember (as that ancient religious leader, Paul, said) agape is patient. We need to be patient with agape because the answer we sense may take longer to fulfill than we wish it would.
Thursday, April 16, 2015
Agapic Self —having agapé for oneself
Each of us is created in such a way that we have a special spiritual power deep in the center of our being. This blog is based on the 2,000-year old Greek tradition of designating that power with the term “agapé.” I call it a spiritual power because it is capable of opening us up spiritually.
When we fully, honestly accept the transforming process that agape [for convenience I decided to drop the accented é], can do for us, we usually experience that process as having agape for oneself. Sometimes a person’s early childhood experiences and training and indoctrination causes a life-long search to be able to have agape for oneself.
The first awareness of that search is expressed as “loving oneself.” Such a search is advanced tremendously when we can deeply believe that we can have agape for ourselves as God has agape for us. But eventually, as we are able to let agape work within us, we experience agape opening us up spiritually. Then we are able to gain the realization that agape is transforming our ‘sense of self’ so that we find out that what we thought of ‘our self’ is not our true self.
I call this the beginning of agapic transformation. (“Agapic” is a new word that came to me the other day. I’m not familiar enough with Greek to know if there actually is a word to express what I was wanting to describe, so I’ll just stick with that word and use it for the expression “Agapic Self.”) In agapic transformation we learn that our true self is spiritual, and thus we are able to get beyond any false identification with the defense mechanisms that developed within us from early childhood experiences and became very confused during and shortly after puberty.
What I’m trying to describe is the original core of the being each of us was created to be. We were created with agape “poured into our heart-center” (as the ancient religious leader, Paul, would say). So that at base of our being we are agape. We can describe that self, which is meant to develop from that new beginning — our true self -- as our “agapic self.” When I capitalized it in the previous paragraph, I was expressing my belief that it is divine: we are a small part of the one, flowing, vast Agapic Self.
But of course, something must have gone wrong in most of us because we grew to think we could ignore the spiritual power of agape in our heart-center. Such ignoring happened as our defense mechanisms grew stronger. Many spiritual traditions give such a process of false identifying the name “ego-identity” (or abbreviated, “ego”). At an important point in your adulthood, you find a deep-seated need to make a choice: either continue trying to function with the dangerous ego-identity or fully accept a new identity with agapic self.
If you have the strength and courage to choose to get beyond any ego-identity, at first you will experience an internal struggling. We are told in Western Civilization that we have to fear the loss of identity. The internal struggling comes from such fear. So first we have to face then overcome that fear. What helps is the realization that such a fear is unfounded.
When we fully, honestly accept the transforming process that agape [for convenience I decided to drop the accented é], can do for us, we usually experience that process as having agape for oneself. Sometimes a person’s early childhood experiences and training and indoctrination causes a life-long search to be able to have agape for oneself.
The first awareness of that search is expressed as “loving oneself.” Such a search is advanced tremendously when we can deeply believe that we can have agape for ourselves as God has agape for us. But eventually, as we are able to let agape work within us, we experience agape opening us up spiritually. Then we are able to gain the realization that agape is transforming our ‘sense of self’ so that we find out that what we thought of ‘our self’ is not our true self.
I call this the beginning of agapic transformation. (“Agapic” is a new word that came to me the other day. I’m not familiar enough with Greek to know if there actually is a word to express what I was wanting to describe, so I’ll just stick with that word and use it for the expression “Agapic Self.”) In agapic transformation we learn that our true self is spiritual, and thus we are able to get beyond any false identification with the defense mechanisms that developed within us from early childhood experiences and became very confused during and shortly after puberty.
What I’m trying to describe is the original core of the being each of us was created to be. We were created with agape “poured into our heart-center” (as the ancient religious leader, Paul, would say). So that at base of our being we are agape. We can describe that self, which is meant to develop from that new beginning — our true self -- as our “agapic self.” When I capitalized it in the previous paragraph, I was expressing my belief that it is divine: we are a small part of the one, flowing, vast Agapic Self.
But of course, something must have gone wrong in most of us because we grew to think we could ignore the spiritual power of agape in our heart-center. Such ignoring happened as our defense mechanisms grew stronger. Many spiritual traditions give such a process of false identifying the name “ego-identity” (or abbreviated, “ego”). At an important point in your adulthood, you find a deep-seated need to make a choice: either continue trying to function with the dangerous ego-identity or fully accept a new identity with agapic self.
If you have the strength and courage to choose to get beyond any ego-identity, at first you will experience an internal struggling. We are told in Western Civilization that we have to fear the loss of identity. The internal struggling comes from such fear. So first we have to face then overcome that fear. What helps is the realization that such a fear is unfounded.
Saturday, August 30, 2014
Agapé vs. “The Knowledge of Good and Evil”
In the book A General Theory of Love, by Thomas Lewis, Fari Amini, and Richard Lannon, I found a reworking of the evolutionary development of the human brain. They described the primitive ancient base of the brain, popularly called the “reptile brain,” as the seat of those physical drives that get people into so much trouble.
When I read about that, I remembered once reading an interpretation of Genesis 3:1-7. In that ancient story of the origin of “the knowledge of good and evil,” such ‘knowledge’ happened by being tempted by a lie coming from a reptile. The interpretation was given in terms of the human brain: the false dualism of “good and evil” coming from our “reptile brain.”
Such dualism is portrayed as originating from the great deception caused by listening to our “reptile brain” instead of to the advanced brain of the neocortex. That false way of perceiving life makes humans think that they can take into themselves (“eat the fruit”) some way of knowing that there can be such opposition of “good” and “evil.” It’s a false way of seeing life split up, such that life can be separated into “good” and “evil.” Such a deceptive way of seeing builds up the possibly for life to be no longer a unified whole (where whatever happens just happens), but can be somehow thought of as divided into something that is good and something that is evil.
So what is portrayed, in that ancient story of anthropological origins, enters historically as the deception that developed near the origin of civilization is based on turning away from the unifying force of Life in order to start believing in the separation of good and evil. (In other words, the Great Lie, that there somehow is good and evil, is where evil entered history and human consciousness.)
Albert Einstein once wrote: “We experience ourselves, our thoughts and feelings, as something separate from the rest -- a kind of optical delusion of consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for few persons nearest us. …Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature.”
The more I thought about those theories, the more I reflected on the origin of human turning away from agape. When we realize agape as the unifying spiritual power, then we can fully comprehend what happened when too many people let fear block them from receiving agape into their lives. It is the spiritual power of agape that helps people overcome the false dualism of “good and evil.” Building a worldview based on fear leads to the dualism of “good and evil,” but building a worldview based on agape leads to the unity of life and ultimate peace.
When I read Marianne Williamson quote in her book, A Return to Love, the great passage from the New Testament book, 1 John, that reads “God is agape,” I understood that she was meaning ‘agape’ whenever she used ‘love’ in a spiritual way. So I went thru her book and copied down quotes changing ‘love’ to ‘agape.’ For example, “Once we get to the point where we realize that God is agape, we understand that following God simply means following the dictates of agape. By affirming that agape is our priority in a situation, we actualize the power of God.”
There has developed tremendous pressure for people to think that they have to perceive life from fear. Such perceiving usually gets interpreted to mean we perceive without agape. So we have to unlearn all of that in order to perceive life thru the power of agape instead of perceiving life from fear. Most of us spend the developmental years of life having our brains wired to perceive ourselves as separate from all other beings, and so we have a great deal of difficulty accepting the unifying power of agape. But agape is powerful enough to overcome that “optical delusion of consciousness” if we will only open up and let it happen for us.
But that is precisely our task in life — our purpose in being.
When I read about that, I remembered once reading an interpretation of Genesis 3:1-7. In that ancient story of the origin of “the knowledge of good and evil,” such ‘knowledge’ happened by being tempted by a lie coming from a reptile. The interpretation was given in terms of the human brain: the false dualism of “good and evil” coming from our “reptile brain.”
Such dualism is portrayed as originating from the great deception caused by listening to our “reptile brain” instead of to the advanced brain of the neocortex. That false way of perceiving life makes humans think that they can take into themselves (“eat the fruit”) some way of knowing that there can be such opposition of “good” and “evil.” It’s a false way of seeing life split up, such that life can be separated into “good” and “evil.” Such a deceptive way of seeing builds up the possibly for life to be no longer a unified whole (where whatever happens just happens), but can be somehow thought of as divided into something that is good and something that is evil.
So what is portrayed, in that ancient story of anthropological origins, enters historically as the deception that developed near the origin of civilization is based on turning away from the unifying force of Life in order to start believing in the separation of good and evil. (In other words, the Great Lie, that there somehow is good and evil, is where evil entered history and human consciousness.)
Albert Einstein once wrote: “We experience ourselves, our thoughts and feelings, as something separate from the rest -- a kind of optical delusion of consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for few persons nearest us. …Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature.”
The more I thought about those theories, the more I reflected on the origin of human turning away from agape. When we realize agape as the unifying spiritual power, then we can fully comprehend what happened when too many people let fear block them from receiving agape into their lives. It is the spiritual power of agape that helps people overcome the false dualism of “good and evil.” Building a worldview based on fear leads to the dualism of “good and evil,” but building a worldview based on agape leads to the unity of life and ultimate peace.
When I read Marianne Williamson quote in her book, A Return to Love, the great passage from the New Testament book, 1 John, that reads “God is agape,” I understood that she was meaning ‘agape’ whenever she used ‘love’ in a spiritual way. So I went thru her book and copied down quotes changing ‘love’ to ‘agape.’ For example, “Once we get to the point where we realize that God is agape, we understand that following God simply means following the dictates of agape. By affirming that agape is our priority in a situation, we actualize the power of God.”
There has developed tremendous pressure for people to think that they have to perceive life from fear. Such perceiving usually gets interpreted to mean we perceive without agape. So we have to unlearn all of that in order to perceive life thru the power of agape instead of perceiving life from fear. Most of us spend the developmental years of life having our brains wired to perceive ourselves as separate from all other beings, and so we have a great deal of difficulty accepting the unifying power of agape. But agape is powerful enough to overcome that “optical delusion of consciousness” if we will only open up and let it happen for us.
But that is precisely our task in life — our purpose in being.
Saturday, July 5, 2014
Agapé and Suffering
In the movie, “The Fault in Our Stars,” the proposition is made that pain demands to be felt. And because the movie is about people dying of cancer, there is a lot of pain being felt on the screen. Many spiritual leaders throughout history have made a distinction between pain and suffering. Pain is a biological function, and suffering is the human response to feeling pain.
So the spiritual teaching has always been that pain must be acknowledged and fully felt. Of course there is a temporary period of suffering as a response to experiencing pain. But there is a much worse, more intense, longer lasting period of suffering if the effort is made out of fear to try to avoid or deaden the experience of pain.
One of the first spiritual leaders to talk about that profound truth, around 2,500 years ago in India, was the Buddha. He tried to warn the human race that even though pain is inevitable, suffering can be limited to only the temporary period of pain. But the limiting can only be accomplished if people first acknowledge that pain is actually inevitable. Then there can’t be any extraordinary attempts to avoid pain and suffering. Pain has to be faced and fully felt in order to get beyond the pain. Of course, at first, that may seem to go against our greatest fears.
Of course, we don’t want to be masochists and bring on more pain than we have to. And there have been helpful developments in anesthesia to aid in certain medical procedures such as surgery. So the point is to find a way to creatively deal with pain when it cannot be avoided instead of trying to pretend our way out of ever having to feel pain.
Just as the crucifixion of Jesus (and the persecution, beatings, and murder of so many of his followers during the centuries that followed) should have been all the evidence needed to prove to Christians that it is not the point of religion to escape suffering, so people should look to spiritual teaching to find the way to deal with pain and suffering. And that of course leads us to agape meditation.
In one of the many periodical articles about meditation, studies were reported showing that pain and inflammation can be managed with intense, prolonged meditation because it leads to changes in genes that play a role in pain. Research has shown also that meditation is effective with cardiac disorders, depression, anxiety, and immune function. Agape meditation is one type that helps more effectively connecting with all that is around us, so that we can deeply understand our ‘natural’ reactions. And that helps us deal with suffering as a reaction.
That seems to be why Paul started his great teaching about agape in Romans by pointing out that the pain and suffering from the troubles that come with life produce endurance, and “endurance produces character, and character produces hope.” That is the hope that comes from meditating with God’s agape “that has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit given to us.” Through thus meditating with God’s agape within and around us, we are given the deep understanding of the way pain is merely an integral aspect of life. In this way we lose the fear of pain. Being free of the fear is crucial point necessary for creatively dealing with pain in life.
So the spiritual teaching has always been that pain must be acknowledged and fully felt. Of course there is a temporary period of suffering as a response to experiencing pain. But there is a much worse, more intense, longer lasting period of suffering if the effort is made out of fear to try to avoid or deaden the experience of pain.
One of the first spiritual leaders to talk about that profound truth, around 2,500 years ago in India, was the Buddha. He tried to warn the human race that even though pain is inevitable, suffering can be limited to only the temporary period of pain. But the limiting can only be accomplished if people first acknowledge that pain is actually inevitable. Then there can’t be any extraordinary attempts to avoid pain and suffering. Pain has to be faced and fully felt in order to get beyond the pain. Of course, at first, that may seem to go against our greatest fears.
Of course, we don’t want to be masochists and bring on more pain than we have to. And there have been helpful developments in anesthesia to aid in certain medical procedures such as surgery. So the point is to find a way to creatively deal with pain when it cannot be avoided instead of trying to pretend our way out of ever having to feel pain.
Just as the crucifixion of Jesus (and the persecution, beatings, and murder of so many of his followers during the centuries that followed) should have been all the evidence needed to prove to Christians that it is not the point of religion to escape suffering, so people should look to spiritual teaching to find the way to deal with pain and suffering. And that of course leads us to agape meditation.
In one of the many periodical articles about meditation, studies were reported showing that pain and inflammation can be managed with intense, prolonged meditation because it leads to changes in genes that play a role in pain. Research has shown also that meditation is effective with cardiac disorders, depression, anxiety, and immune function. Agape meditation is one type that helps more effectively connecting with all that is around us, so that we can deeply understand our ‘natural’ reactions. And that helps us deal with suffering as a reaction.
That seems to be why Paul started his great teaching about agape in Romans by pointing out that the pain and suffering from the troubles that come with life produce endurance, and “endurance produces character, and character produces hope.” That is the hope that comes from meditating with God’s agape “that has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit given to us.” Through thus meditating with God’s agape within and around us, we are given the deep understanding of the way pain is merely an integral aspect of life. In this way we lose the fear of pain. Being free of the fear is crucial point necessary for creatively dealing with pain in life.
Thursday, June 26, 2014
The Agapé way of seeing
In an amazing survey of mysticism in the world religions, entitled The Inner Eye of Love, there is a brief reference to agapé. The author, Fr. William Johnston (an Irish Jesuit who served in Japan directing the Institute of Oriental Religions), discussed how the early Christians used the word, agapé, to refer to something so completely different from what then was ordinarily thought of as love.
Johnston explained that today, also, there needed to be a new word other than ‘love’ to express the journey of mysticism. It’s needed because every step of such a journey is “enlighten and guided by a living flame, a blind stirring, a love which has no reservations or restrictions.” Such a kind of love is not what is ordinarily meant by that word. This kind of love “burns at a very deep level of consciousness.” And so today, too, we need to use that ancient Greek word, ‘agapé.’ But all the time, Johnston acknowledges that whatever word we try to use, with the limited vocabularies we humans have at our disposal, what we are trying to express is deeper and more powerful and more wondrous and more mysterious than any of our attempts to express it.
Also he speaks of every stage of the journey requiring a new way of seeing. We might call that the agape way of seeing. When we relate to another person with agape, we discover that agape helps us see to the very core of the other, in order to be able to relate to the inner Essence of the other. Also agape helps us see the basis of our own true essence, and so helps us see the difference between the ego and the Essence within us.
In The Way to Love by Fr. Anthony De Mello (a Jesuit from India) he talked about “the art of looking.” This is how you do it: Every time you find yourself irritated or angry with someone, the one to look at is not that person but yourself. The question to ask is not, “What’s wrong with this person?” but “What does this irritation tell me about myself ?” By looking with agape in this way, the other person will help you see not only a self-revelation but more importantly also a Self-revelation. You will see more clearly the eternal Essence that is your true identity. And that way of looking will help you understand more deeply that you are not an ego-identity.
We don’t like to face this aspect of agape seeing, but De Mello pointed out in harsh detail that agape can help us to ruthlessly flash the light of awareness on our own motives, and to see the emotions and needs of our egos. And so agape can help us face our dishonesty, our self-seeking, and our tendency to control and manipulate. This way of seeing ourselves is necessary to help us see how to free ourselves from identifying with our ego.
He concluded that we cannot truly love other people in the way agape helps us love until we can see them in the full reality of the moment, no longer relying on ideas, conceptions and conditioning, perceptions, prejudices and projections that have been constructed by our egos. But if you are to love the agape way you must learn to truly see. When you look at people this way, you see them in their inner beauty and goodness; then you transform and create.
Johnston explained that today, also, there needed to be a new word other than ‘love’ to express the journey of mysticism. It’s needed because every step of such a journey is “enlighten and guided by a living flame, a blind stirring, a love which has no reservations or restrictions.” Such a kind of love is not what is ordinarily meant by that word. This kind of love “burns at a very deep level of consciousness.” And so today, too, we need to use that ancient Greek word, ‘agapé.’ But all the time, Johnston acknowledges that whatever word we try to use, with the limited vocabularies we humans have at our disposal, what we are trying to express is deeper and more powerful and more wondrous and more mysterious than any of our attempts to express it.
Also he speaks of every stage of the journey requiring a new way of seeing. We might call that the agape way of seeing. When we relate to another person with agape, we discover that agape helps us see to the very core of the other, in order to be able to relate to the inner Essence of the other. Also agape helps us see the basis of our own true essence, and so helps us see the difference between the ego and the Essence within us.
In The Way to Love by Fr. Anthony De Mello (a Jesuit from India) he talked about “the art of looking.” This is how you do it: Every time you find yourself irritated or angry with someone, the one to look at is not that person but yourself. The question to ask is not, “What’s wrong with this person?” but “What does this irritation tell me about myself ?” By looking with agape in this way, the other person will help you see not only a self-revelation but more importantly also a Self-revelation. You will see more clearly the eternal Essence that is your true identity. And that way of looking will help you understand more deeply that you are not an ego-identity.
We don’t like to face this aspect of agape seeing, but De Mello pointed out in harsh detail that agape can help us to ruthlessly flash the light of awareness on our own motives, and to see the emotions and needs of our egos. And so agape can help us face our dishonesty, our self-seeking, and our tendency to control and manipulate. This way of seeing ourselves is necessary to help us see how to free ourselves from identifying with our ego.
He concluded that we cannot truly love other people in the way agape helps us love until we can see them in the full reality of the moment, no longer relying on ideas, conceptions and conditioning, perceptions, prejudices and projections that have been constructed by our egos. But if you are to love the agape way you must learn to truly see. When you look at people this way, you see them in their inner beauty and goodness; then you transform and create.
Monday, June 2, 2014
Agape and ways to pray
The Rev. Samuel Wells of London wrote about praying in the April 30, 2014 Christian Century. That article came from a conversation after worship in the church he serves. After some ‘coffee hour chit-chat,’ the parishioner took hold of his forearm, and her tone changed. “Say a prayer for my dad, will you? He's not himself, the dementia's really kicking in.”
He gave his standard answer: “Of course I'll pray for your dad. And I'll pray for you, too.” Later he wondered deeply: How exactly do you pray for a person in such a situation? When he later reflected on that question, he came up with this summary of 3 ways to pray.
The 1st he calls resurrection — a call for a miracle. That would be a prayer for healing of mind and body. Wells admits that this kind of prayer is tempting, but he wondered about the times when he honestly feels that healing just isn't going to happen.
The 2nd he labels incarnation — asking that the Holy Spirit to be with the person and family ... give them patience to endure what lies ahead ... and companions to show them agape. He saw a dramatic difference between these two kinds of prayer: "while the resurrection prayer expects God to do all the work, this (2nd) prayer stirs us into action ourselves." Who is better placed to show God's agape than the person praying? Also he felt that her request for prayer was partly a plea that she not feel alone in what she was facing.
A 3rd option (beyond miracles or a comforting presence) is a prayer of transfiguration — looking for something spiritually new. "Show my friend and her father your glory, that they may find a deeper truth to their lives than they ever knew, make firmer friends than they ever had, discover reasons for living beyond what they'd ever imagined." And this kind of prayer can bring the person praying to awareness of fresh insights of meaning and purpose.
After reading that article, I began reflecting on those insights in relation to agape.
The 1st and 3rd ways are opening to the spiritual power of agape as it already flows — to bring “transfiguration” in the life of the person praying as well as holding in prayer another’s life and its possibility of deeper spiritual reality; and “resurrection” thru the power of agape. Because there is always a healing aspect involved in the power of agape, and we have no control over how that healing works, we can actually never do any more than pray for agape to work in another’s life in whatever way agape can work. The outcomes in life are never in our control anyway, so in agape meditation we must always relinquish control whenever we enter agape meditation. The initial part of the 3rd way to pray (“Show my friend and her father your glory, that they may find a deeper truth to their lives than they ever knew”), is the main reason that agape continues to be poured into our hearts thru the Holy Spirit.
The 2nd way is how we let agape work thru the actions of our lives, so that we share God’s agape with the relationships of our lives. So not only do we pray for the person to find more ways to open to agape power, but when we actually are physically with that person, we take the action of sharing agape with her or him. In that way we participate in the flow of spiritual power of agape between persons.
He gave his standard answer: “Of course I'll pray for your dad. And I'll pray for you, too.” Later he wondered deeply: How exactly do you pray for a person in such a situation? When he later reflected on that question, he came up with this summary of 3 ways to pray.
The 1st he calls resurrection — a call for a miracle. That would be a prayer for healing of mind and body. Wells admits that this kind of prayer is tempting, but he wondered about the times when he honestly feels that healing just isn't going to happen.
The 2nd he labels incarnation — asking that the Holy Spirit to be with the person and family ... give them patience to endure what lies ahead ... and companions to show them agape. He saw a dramatic difference between these two kinds of prayer: "while the resurrection prayer expects God to do all the work, this (2nd) prayer stirs us into action ourselves." Who is better placed to show God's agape than the person praying? Also he felt that her request for prayer was partly a plea that she not feel alone in what she was facing.
A 3rd option (beyond miracles or a comforting presence) is a prayer of transfiguration — looking for something spiritually new. "Show my friend and her father your glory, that they may find a deeper truth to their lives than they ever knew, make firmer friends than they ever had, discover reasons for living beyond what they'd ever imagined." And this kind of prayer can bring the person praying to awareness of fresh insights of meaning and purpose.
After reading that article, I began reflecting on those insights in relation to agape.
The 1st and 3rd ways are opening to the spiritual power of agape as it already flows — to bring “transfiguration” in the life of the person praying as well as holding in prayer another’s life and its possibility of deeper spiritual reality; and “resurrection” thru the power of agape. Because there is always a healing aspect involved in the power of agape, and we have no control over how that healing works, we can actually never do any more than pray for agape to work in another’s life in whatever way agape can work. The outcomes in life are never in our control anyway, so in agape meditation we must always relinquish control whenever we enter agape meditation. The initial part of the 3rd way to pray (“Show my friend and her father your glory, that they may find a deeper truth to their lives than they ever knew”), is the main reason that agape continues to be poured into our hearts thru the Holy Spirit.
The 2nd way is how we let agape work thru the actions of our lives, so that we share God’s agape with the relationships of our lives. So not only do we pray for the person to find more ways to open to agape power, but when we actually are physically with that person, we take the action of sharing agape with her or him. In that way we participate in the flow of spiritual power of agape between persons.
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